July 2020

Self-Care During Bereavement and Loss

During these challenging times, we all have experiences small losses and possibly even major losses--of jobs, friends, or family members. If you have suffered any kind of significant loss, it is normal to feel numb, empty, anxious, depressed, or intensely sad. This can occur shortly after a major loss or to some extent at the anniversary of a loss. What can you do to get through this difficult time?

1. Talk about it. Share these feelings with friends, family members, or a minister, rabbi, or other religious resource--anyone that you feel supports you and can listen with compassion. If you find it hard to talk with those in your everyday life, consider seeing a professional counselor. In addition you health practitioners may be of assistance or be able to refer you to appropriate trusted professionals in your community.

2. Remembering to get a massage, do a meditation, pray, or whatever helps you get though your distress in a healthy way--can be valuable. If you receive a massage, you might want to have one that is a little longer than usual or have one more often. Massage therapy increases circulation. Stress hormones are flushed away, and the flow of endorphins which naturally elevate mood, are increased. In a massage session, you can let go of stress and enjoy a much-needed sense of peace and nurturing. Massage sometimes prompts tears to flow, and the expression of sadness. This is a natural and normal emotional response to nurturing touch.

3. People who are grieving not only feel overwhelmed with sadness, but often feel very sensitive to their environment. You may want to find a place that feels particularly safe to express your feelings in in a way that does not hurt you or others--for instance shouting into a pillow, or ripping up paper or rags. You can also participate in formal or informal support groups, or spend time at a favorite place in nature. Include yourself on the list of people you give support to.

Wishing you a sense of peace and well-being!

Adapted from Client Education Handouts for Self-Care, Information for People